{"product_id":"my-battery-is-low-my-standards-are-lower","title":"My Battery Is Low. My Standards Are Lower.","description":"A laid-back, garment-dyed tee built to feel lived-in from day one. The heavyweight cotton and relaxed cut hang like your favorite go-to shirt, while the soft, post-dye finish gives it a subtle vintage character. This tee carries a bold, tongue-in-cheek statement on the back — a confident, witty line that reads like something you’d say between friends. Wear it to low-key gatherings, casual nights out, or when you want clothes that match a dry sense of humor. It pairs easily with denim, flannel, or a worn-in jacket and keeps its shape thanks to double-needle stitching and pre-shrunk ring-spun cotton.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% ring-spun US cotton — heavyweight (6.1 oz\/yd²) for durability and comfort\u003cbr\u003e- Garment-dyed after construction for a soft, lived-in color and texture\u003cbr\u003e- Relaxed fit with no side seams (tubular knit) for a clean drape\u003cbr\u003e- Double-needle stitching on all seams and sewn-in label for long-lasting wear\u003cbr\u003e- Sizes S–4XL available; pre-shrunk to maintain fit\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":48701531881726,"sku":"25236743083297882222","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":48701531914494,"sku":"21256695938309459448","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ S","offer_id":48701531947262,"sku":"66916792657490923186","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":48701531980030,"sku":"23030505876064130833","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":48701532012798,"sku":"36991028808110155924","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ M","offer_id":48701532045566,"sku":"17723656417650121726","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":48701532078334,"sku":"21380029886125136161","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":48701532111102,"sku":"14502113677767214128","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":48701532143870,"sku":"21771928739272780235","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":48701532176638,"sku":"20964830785003449226","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":48701532209406,"sku":"29360990328015437624","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":48701532242174,"sku":"42298548582513197829","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":48701532274942,"sku":"21463595976931412797","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":48701532307710,"sku":"29830348202059672240","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":48701532340478,"sku":"27260323024779235521","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":48701532373246,"sku":"26433118541425486525","price":36.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 3XL","offer_id":48701532406014,"sku":"69205655973955117478","price":36.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":48701532438782,"sku":"10522519102687314658","price":36.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":48701532471550,"sku":"28163556951406886652","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 4XL","offer_id":48701532504318,"sku":"31744039680275649757","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":48701532537086,"sku":"13032675035604914643","price":38.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0824\/0031\/3598\/files\/8324066004355817563_2048.jpg?v=1786244591","url":"https:\/\/unserius.com\/products\/my-battery-is-low-my-standards-are-lower","provider":"UNSERIUS","version":"1.0","type":"link"}